My Monkey Baby

For today’s Mama Kat’s Writers’ Workshop, I’m writing on my strangest dream ever (prompt #2).

I am so glad that I thought to type out my first pregnancy dream the day after I had it. I had forgotten how crazy it was until I re-read it last night. I was about 2 months pregnant at the time and preparing for my 5 year high school reunion. So here goes:

It was late at night and I was standing in a parking lot, outside of a small car. I had just given birth in that car, at the same time as another Latina woman. She’d had quadruplet boys and I’d had a girl. I entered the car to bring my daughter home, but the other woman tried to tell me the baby was hers. She had even named the girl Attila.

So, this baby girl was huge…like at least 10 lbs huge. The weird thing? I’d given birth at 4 months. All I could think was “darn, I never even got to show!”

Somehow I get my daughter from this other woman and her quadruplets, and my baby and I are just walking around. She is the PERFECT baby. She was very smiley and quiet. However, she was totally naked, just having been birthed and all, and we had no clothes for her. Mark bought her some bright yellow diapers.

Then, I decided to take Attila to my high school reunion. As I was showing her to various classmates, I noticed she was growing more and more hair.

She turned into a Pygmy Marmoset!!! An evil one! One who jumped out of my arms and bit my classmates on the head!

from pygmymarmoset.html

And I was like “CRAP! What am I going to do with a Marmoset baby?!?! Is her tail going to shrink? Will her fangs go away?”

My mother told me “that’s what happens to premature babies,” and that I couldn’t breastfeed anymore or she’d bite me.

What was YOUR strangest dream?



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18 responses to “My Monkey Baby

  1. What a funny dream! Glad you included a picture of the baby here so I know what it looked like. That was one crazy dream, all right! I usually have nice dreams about normal things so chose the prompt on how to avoid boredom.

    Visiting from Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop.

  2. That’s freaking hilarious!! I don’t remember any of my pregnancy dreams, but then again, I don’t usually remember my dreams. Maybe that’s a good thing…
    Stopping by from Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop!

  3. That is a good one!!! What a crazy dream to have! I just had an odd dream last night that Andrew and I were going to elope and the ppl at my work threw me a bridal shower. They made me a veil out of paper plates and napkins, then suddenly I was at my grandparents house getting ready and I was so nervous, my brother came in and tried to comfort me but he didn’t want my parents to know what I was doing. Thankfully I woke up shortly after!

  4. I had tons of odd pregnancy dreams. I can’t recall any of them, but I remember that they were often very bloody. In other news, by four months I was HUGE! As a matter of fact, I look like I’m 4 months pregnant right now.

  5. WOW that’s pretty crazy dream for sure but made a great blog entry 😀 I too had plenty of those weird dreams but oddly enough I can’t remember them now.

  6. I would have had to stop breastfeeding also! My son occasionally bites me, he has one tooth coming in on the bottom and it hurts like a mofo only, I’m like 2 months away from him turning a year old so I’m trying to hang in there….

  7. Brenda

    Before I got pregnant, but was trying I dreamed that I gave birth to a puppy – who looked just like our dog! So I told my b/f about the dream and he was like well that figures since you love the dog more than me! Okay, so I wasn’t pregnant, but it was pretty weird! The only memorable dream while pregnant was that I had a baby girl. Since I was waiting to find out the sex at birth, I dismissed this dream since I knew that I was having a boy, not because I wanted either one sex or the other – but because my intuition told me so – there goes my intuition and I love my daughter so much!!

  8. hahhaahah. oh man. that was hilarious.

    i have strange dreams every night. sometimes i think it’s because i could be harry potter – but the much older, female, mommy version.

  9. Holy cow!!! what had you eaten the night before??? LOL

  10. Dan

    At least I never had pregnancy dreams – although I had to suffer when my wife did. Why is it that sometimes it seems that dreams are so real?

  11. lol. That’s pretty strange, although I have them like that all the time. Well, minus the latino woman…

  12. I used to work with this lady who was really good at interpreting dreams. If I was laid off, I would of definitely asked her what your dream meant.
    I remember I dreamt a lot during each of my three pregnancies. With my last one, I dreamed I was at a beach on a sunny day and this little boy, probably 3-4 year-old, was following me everywhere. Feeling uneasy and thinking the boy was lost, I held his hand and asked him where were his parents, and he looked at me, smiled, and said I was his mom. I woke up soon afterward. I had a girl not a boy. It would of been freaky if I had a boy!

  13. LOLOL Pregnancy dreams are the weirdest, aren’t they?! Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest!

  14. Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest!

    When I was pregnant I had recurring dreams that I gave birth to a kitten or puppy instead of a human baby. The doctors, nurses and my family were all acting like it was totally normal and doting on the little critter while I wailed “What happened to my baby!?” Those dreams scared the snot out of me.

  15. Sandra

    Hi! Thanks for popping by my blog on my special SITS day!

    Man… that wasn’t just a strange dream… it was one scary one! 😛

  16. that was funny! umm I can’t seem to remember whole dreams just pieces,and never fails that I get woken up in the middle of a good one!
    stopping by from Sits

  17. That’s pretty funny. Pregnancy dreams are crazy.

  18. That’s awesome! The strangest dream I had involves my newborn baby, a pitbull and a lot of blood. ‘Nuff said. I was pregnant when I had that dream. That’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it!

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